Time to stop dream-shaming!
Have you experienced Dream-shaming?
Dream-shaming is a word that popped into my mind the other day.
Let me define it:
You share your dream with someone, and encounter a strong reaction to it. As thought you should be ashamed of it.
Most of us learn that some endeavours are more acceptable in our culture than others.
And if you happen to have hopes and dream and wants that are seen as not-so-worthy…?
Cultural expectations can hinder us from living our life the way we want.
You can get disconnected from what you want because of other people’s expectations.
It can be difficult to even know what you actually want when there is so much pressure:
”This is what you ‘should’ want! That is not acceptable…”
So let me ask you:
- Are you allowed to have dreams that you have?
- Are you allowed to want something different than is typical in your family or among your peers?
- Do you feel that you have permission to openly talk about what you want?
There are many ways to learn what is ok and what is not ok to dream about.
You may have heard negative remarks about your wants and dreams from people around you.
Sometimes it can be more subtle. Maybe you merely suspect that other people wouldn’t accept your dreams as worthwhile.
You may have heard some people criticizing others and their endeavors.
And we can’t forget the effect of TV, movies, magazines, and what we see in the media.
Why is it important to talk about dream-shaming?
Here’s something that really bothers me and I don’t think women are supported enough with this:
There are so many expectations about what we should do with our lives.
When our wants and dreams don’t match with the expectation, many of us end up feeling unfulfilled and lonely.
It can be scary to share your dreams with others.
I am a sensitive person, and I used to take a lot of things personally.
It used to feel really bad when someone disagreed with me, or didn’t understand my choices.
That changed when I learned more about how the human mind works and why we can see this world so differently.
And that has made it possible for me to live my life my way not caring so much about what other people think of my life.
I do care about people a lot, but if they don’t think I’m making wise decisions about my life, that’s ok. My life, my decisions.
And that is why I am talking about dream-shaming.
It is time to create safe spaces for women to talk about their dreams. It is time to create safe spaces for women to listen to their inner guidance and do things they want to do.
Time to stop dream-shaming.
And that is something I want to help other women with. I feel called to help women get connected with what they want and be their ally on their journey.
Interested? Send me an email piia(at)piiatuominen.com or DM me on Instagram.